Category Archives: Mind

You have unlimited potential – if life is a car, your mind is the steering wheel – your thoughts are the difference between achieving your goals or looking back on your life with regret.

The grass isn’t always greener…

As I look out of the window, the rain is beating against it and I can barely see outside.

Today is a very strange day, I’m not often affected by the weather but the past few weeks we’ve had nothing but rain – and I think I’m growing a little tired of it.

To lighten my mood, I’ve been listening to music, writing, drawing and thinking about the things I’m blessed with:

Financial comfort
Family
Good food
A roof over my head
Running water
Electricity & gas
Freedom

So what is it that makes us feel these things aren’t enough?

I think a lot of it has to do with our desire for a better life, our belief the grass is always greener.

It reminds me of something I heard once…

If the grass is greener on the other side – tend to your own damn lawn.

It makes me think of a miserable old man sitting in a rocking chair on his patio, complaining about the state of his grass compared to his neighbours.

His neighbour waves across to him while he mows the grass, while the grumpy man looks on with jealousy. Not realising that he too could have a pristine lawn, he just doesn’t want to work for it.

Even recalling the story makes me smile.

I try not to look at anybody else’s life with envy because I understand most people worked hard to get where they are, and I have the ability to choose my own path.

The key to happiness is choosing to be happy as things are right now, with the knowledge that everything else is a bonus. I’ve always understood life can always be better and we have the power to make it so.

I wrote a silly poem in around 2001, I’d like to share it here…

It’s called – The Ant in His Pants

The ant in his pants did rant and rave –
that to his queen he was but a slave.
The curious weasel advised the ant,
who looked quite humble in just his pants:

To put on a suit, walk with a cane
and wear a monocle; which the ant thought insane!
But he gave it a go, and true as I stand,
the queen, in marriage, asked for his hand.

It came to pass that the ant and the queen,
lived happily, or so they’d have you believe.
But the one thing the weasel declined to foretell,
was the one thing which made the poor ant’s life hell.

How does a colony sustain its size?
The ant declared with tears in his eyes,
that he is father to a million more.
Dejected, defeated and feeling quite sore.

Compared to this, life was a walk in the park –
now his poor testicles glow in the dark.
Spare a thought for our six legged friend as he cries.

And if he asks, advise him…

The grass isn’t always greener on the other side.

Nobody cares…

I’m not joking here…

Nobody actually cares!

The sooner you realise that, the sooner you can get on with your own life and be happier.

In the wake of the horrific terrorist attacks on Paris, I find myself thinking about what drives people, why they do what they do and the complete lack of empathy shown by the majority of humans on this planet.

Sure, social media is full of ‘let’s all cry for this and that’, but how long does that really last?

Who actually sits up and makes a change in this world.

It’s fashionable to join in with the conversation when a terrible event occurs – but as a whole, we pay our little bit of lip service and carry on with our lives.

After all, ‘we’ are the center of our own universe and nothing is ever going to change that.

With that in mind – knowing that most people don’t really give a shit what happens outside of their own bubble, why do we place so much emphasis on what people think of US?

I truly believe we shouldn’t.

Everyone has an opinion, but why should somebody else’s opinion be more powerful than our own?

Have you ever had a day where you’re on top of the world, you’ve bought yourself a new outfit and had your hair restyled? You’re receiving compliments from all your friends and family.

Then you overhear a jealous work colleague commenting on the way you dress and it brings you back down to earth with a thud.

In an instant, you become self conscious, uncomfortable with the same choices that made you feel amazing less than 20 seconds ago. Because somebody else said something to change your point of view.

You didn’t even like or respect this person to begin with, but now their opinion has put you in a negative state for the rest of the day.

We give people far too much power over our lives.

For most of us, it’s the negative people who have most influence too.

In our desperation to fit in and be liked, we allow complete strangers to dictate our choices.

Sometimes, the fear of rejection is so great, we refuse to make a choice altogether.

What about the BIGGER decisions such as:

Whether to try for a promotion
Whether to change career
Whether to adopt a more healthy lifestyle
Whether to ask out the person you’ve always liked

Any time you’ve ever considered making a change and asked friends for their opinions, or received opinions you didn’t want, you handed over control to somebody else.

I’ve done it myself…

I’ve listened to friends who told me not to do things because they were too hard. So I didn’t try.
I’ve listened to family who told me to get a job after leaving school. So I did.
I’ve listened to colleagues who told me ‘nobody ever gets a pay rise here’. So I didn’t try.
I’ve listened to school teachers who told me ‘that career is too hard to get in to’. So I didn’t try.

When we give away our power to other people we become helpless and very unhappy.

So what’s the solution?

It begins with a question…

“Who should have power over my life?”

And the answer should always be…

“I do”

I’m guilty of doing the same things – I give power to everybody else and rarely exercise my own power. It’s difficult, but with practice and constantly asking yourself the right questions, new habits can be formed.

I’m making that decision today – I’ll be asking myself the question over and over until I give myself permission to take control of my own decisions without fear of judgement from others. I invite you to do the same.

Ultimately the decision is yours, will you do it?

A little bit of momentum…

It feels awesome to be 2 days into the clean eating and running routine, yep, I got out there again this morning for another run. Providing I can get up early enough to run before my girlfriend goes to work, I’ll be out there tomorrow too.

I really do love running, although at the moment I’m nowhere near the level of fitness I was when I climbed Ben Nevis – but I can already feel some improvements. Today’s run was much easier than yesterday’s. If anybody is considering taking up running, I seriously recommend a Couch to 5k plan.

It’s so good to be forming new habits again – this afternoon, I polished off a mushroom and sun-dried tomato omelette with a side of spinach, and as I finished the final mouthful I told a friend how much I enjoy cooking such simple but tasty food.┬áThis evening’s meal was roast lamb with roasted vegetables, mushrooms and green beans – another triumph of clean eating and a pleasure to eat too.

It’s amazing how picking up old habits can inspire you so much – now that I’m keeping a log of what I’m eating, I’ve found that I don’t even want to reach out for a chocolate bar or a tube of Pringles.

Now I have momentum on my side, things are looking very positive – I’m looking forward to running, I’m looking forward to meals that I know are doing me good, and I’m not craving any of the foods (or should I say snacks) that tempted me just a few days back. I’m not naive enough to think I’ve formed the habit yet – but I’m stubborn, and I’m on a mission now.

The moral of the story is – if you have a goal of any kind, or want to make a change, just start then keep moving forwards.